April 18, 2005

"Because monkeys who steal sometimes become monkeys who smoke."

Okay, I promise I'll get back to the killer robots soon, but I just had to say: People, quit throwing cigarettes to the chimps.

I never thought I'd have to say that. (And yes, I know that chimps aren't monkeys.)

And I better not see any of this sort of thing happening at Sea World, either! Dolphins and sea lions should not smoke. I know it looks cute, but stop it!

Only people should smoke, and only because there's too damn many of them.

Posted by flamingbanjo at April 18, 2005 04:19 PM
Comments

Man, if only the throwing trick worked with things like literature and instruments.

Um, and with people. (Not throwing people, but the people picking up the habits.)

Posted by: ida at April 18, 2005 05:15 PM

I know that I initially learned to read when some kind stranger threw a copy of Breakfast of Champions into my pen. Thank you, kind stranger! It was getting boring playing on the tire swing all day!

Posted by: flamingbanjo at April 18, 2005 05:42 PM

Well, until the big black slab showed up, we'd just spend our days flinging our own poo back-and-forth at each other.

Of course, today we still sort of do the same thing, only now our poo is radioactive and can annihiliate entire continents.

That's a LOT of poo!

Posted by: KING COMTE I at April 19, 2005 09:42 AM

Chimps aren't monkeys?

Posted by: Joshua at April 19, 2005 11:11 AM

Sadly, chimps are not monkeys... but if they learn to read, and can maintain at least a "C" average in school, they can become president. Who needs to be a monkey when you can be on the fast track to pissing on the global economy?

Posted by: Jubilation at April 19, 2005 11:26 AM