Man, if only the throwing trick worked with things like literature and instruments.

Um, and with people. (Not throwing people, but the people picking up the habits.)

I know that I initially learned to read when some kind stranger threw a copy of Breakfast of Champions into my pen. Thank you, kind stranger! It was getting boring playing on the tire swing all day!

Well, until the big black slab showed up, we'd just spend our days flinging our own poo back-and-forth at each other.

Of course, today we still sort of do the same thing, only now our poo is radioactive and can annihiliate entire continents.

That's a LOT of poo!

Chimps aren't monkeys?

Sadly, chimps are not monkeys... but if they learn to read, and can maintain at least a "C" average in school, they can become president. Who needs to be a monkey when you can be on the fast track to pissing on the global economy?